Quotes from Help Wanted
Lorelai: Are you sure it's closed?
Kirk: Well, first I read the sign and then I tried the door in case it was some sort of elaborate ruse.
Lorelai: Designed to keep only you out?
Kirk: There's precedent.
Richard: An office without Margie...
Emily: Seems inconceivable.
Lorelai: Dream with me here, folks.
Dean: Is he really gone?
Rory: Yes.
Dean: Okay.
Rory: What are these?
Lorelai: These are resumés for your grandpa's new secretary.
Rory: There are, like, a hundred of them.
Lorelai: Yes, well, the world is full of eager young people just waiting to have the life sucked out of them by Richard Gilmore.
Rory: If we were gazelles we'd be the first ones eaten at the watering hole.
Lorelai: Well, be thankful we're not gazelles. Now go take a shower, you're starting to look like you're starring in an independent film.
Lorelai: It's freezing in here.
Richard: Yes, it has been since I moved in.
Lorelai: Oh. Did you try adjusting the thermostat?
Richard: Yes, that only seemed to make it angry.
Lorelai: Look what I found under your copper ball glued to the wood thing here.
Richard: It's brass. One of the firm's parting gifts as they nudged me into retirement.
Lorelai: So, in addition to being heavy and ugly, it's also insulting.
Richard: Quite.
Lorelai: What's the first thing you do when you get to the office in the morning?
Richard: Uh, well, let's see, I return the calls from Asia first.
Lorelai: That's right, you make coffee. So, you'll need a coffee-maker. Let's see: ugly, crappy, German – oooh, pretty!
Emily: Lorelai?
Lorelai: Yes.
Emily: Well, you're crude and unprofessional.
Lorelai: Well, I'd like that on my tombstone, please.
Rory: Luke.
Luke: What?
Rory: It wasn't his fault.
Luke: I know it wasn't.
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