Quotes from Red Light on a Wedding Night

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Rory: Okay, our house is burning down. You have to save the cake or me, which do you choose?
Lorelai: Oh, that's not fair, the cake doesn't have legs.

Rory: Is it right to be sampling wedding cakes when Sookie's making yours for free?
Lorelai: What is right, anyway, y'know? Who defines right? And if eating cake is wrong, I don't want to be right.

Lorelai: Whatchoo doing?
Rory: Taking back Poland.
Lorelai: Oh. Good luck with that.

Dean: Go with their bits.
Max: Their bits?
Dean: Yeah, like... if you're eating pizza with them and Lorelai decides that the pepperoni is angry at the mushrooms because the mushrooms have an attitude and then she holds up a pepperoni and the pepperoni asks for your opinion? Don't just laugh. Answer the pepperoni.
Max: Answer the pepperoni.

Max: Really not fair.
Lorelai: I've got a lingerie drawer full of not fair, mister.

Babette: Stick your hand down some guy's pants for me, would you?
Lorelai: I hope you're talking about a stripper.
Babette: Whatever.

Luke: It's not biologically natural for people to mate for life. Animals don't mate for life. Well, ducks do. But who the hell cares what ducks do?

Lorelai: Excuse me, sir, you look just like my mother.
Rory: Hey, grandma, come here often?
Emily: I should say not! How did you get in?
Rory: Oh, apparently I'm an internationally known supermodel.

Michel: I feel like crap on toast.

Max: I drank copiously.
Lorelai: People who drank copiously the night before do not use words like "copiously."

Lorelai: Pack.
Rory: What?
Lorelai: Pack!
Rory: What's going on?
Lorelai: We are hitting the road.
Rory: What?
Lorelai: Pack everything! Travelling light is for girls.

Rory: Are you and Max getting married?
Lorelai: No.
Rory: Why?
Lorelai: Because I didn't want to try on my wedding dress every night.

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